THE ZOM ZOM CHRONICLES chapter 15 ( The H.M.S. Tetanus (We Are Building a Boat!)
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LOG_ENTRY_01
THE H.M.S. TETANUS
The bridge is a bomb, rigged by the Army to keep the "sickos" out of the Safe Zone. Road travel is 0% viable. The current is too strong to swim, and the water is probably toxic sludge by now. We are building a boat.
The Merger
Brenda didn't look like a survivor anymore—she looked like a CEO closing a merger. She played the "Buster Card" perfectly to get Joe on board.
Joe's Price for the Build:
- Safety for Buster (The Rottweiler)
- Heartworm Medication
- Strict recognition of the "Chain-link Limitation"
"I can build you a barge," Joe said. "Ugly. Slow. But it floats."
Assembly Crew
Cue the 80s rock. Sparks are flying. Grease is everywhere.
| Crew Member | Project Role | Skill / Trait |
|---|---|---|
| Joe Scrap | Architect & Welder | Fixes anything with duct tape and swearing |
| Brenda | Project Manager | Alloy Specialist |
| Dave | Gopher | Hood Ornament Collector |
| Whiskers | Safety Supervisor | Bopped the Dog |
The Iron Duck Specs
- Chassis: Welded car hoods
- Pontoons: 12 Blue Plastic Barrels
- Railing: Recycled exhaust pipes
- Seating: Minivan Bucket Seat
TACTICAL RISK: The motor is LOUD. Once it starts, every Zom on the waterfront is going to hear us.
Blueprints
[ THE S.S. RUSTY BUCKET ]
(BOW - FRONT)
/===========\ <-- Reinforced Ram
| [DAVE] | <-- Lookout Spot
| [ JOE ] | <-- Engineering
|_____________|
| [BRENDA] | <-- Captain Chair
| [ ME ] | <-- Ballast
|_____________|
| [WHISKERS] | <-- High Ground
| [BUSTER] |
\_____________/
| |
[ MOTOR ] <-- 1998 Evinrude
Launch Prep Status
System Check Complete:
- Motor: Smoky but functional
- Fuel: Sufficient
- Crew: Sleeping
TOMORROW, WE BECOME PIRATES.
DATA SAVED TO MAINFRAME